I’m afraid I am rather upset today. I had my latest EAP counselling session in Dublin and left it very upset, and partly stunned. Perhaps it is just a reaction over hearing advice that I don’t like.
Anyway, it concerns my daughter, who is nearly 13. Since I last saw the counsellor she has talked to a child psychologist (without me knowing) because she was “disturbed” by one or two things I have said. The comments that the two of them have concluded are that with daughter going through puberty that she is at her most vulnerable, and that I would be much better waiting until she is 16 (ie over THREE years from now) before I come out; this left me both upset and gobsmacked. Also, what upset me most was a comment that I would be “committing emotional abuse” by telling her so soon, and that “I need to remain a father figure for her as I have a legal right as a parent”.
Although daughter will almost certainly be shocked when I come out, who says I can’t be just as good a parent? Personally, I think I have become a better person as Andrea, and surely it is just as important for her as for me that I become emotionally much happier and more stable?
I KNOW I am on a selfish journey, but the thought of having to keep Andrea on a temporary basis for so much longer is not a thought I feel I can entertain.